Me Myself & B'Elanna
by VoyagerCat
Summary: "Lieutenant!" "I no, airlock city for me."
1. Default Chapter

By Tammy & Kimberly Young

"Me Myself & B'Elanna"

By VoyagerCat

Chapter 1

Disclaimer --- God created man.Man created Start Trek Voyager.I created life for the characters.Rated PG13 Ó2001

"Mr. Kim, if you don't tell me the Naballan have retreated, I'm going to demote you to crewman."Kathryn Janeway pulled a strand of hair out of her face and tried unsuccessfully to smooth it behind her ear.

"I suppose I get to be Ensign for a little longer then Captain.The Naballan have retreated."

"Thanks Harry.Since you are to remain my best Ensign for a while, I suggest you change your uniform.You look like hell."She could barely hold back the laugh in her throat.It had been well needed for the crew the last few days.Tensions were high, and tempers were beginning to flare.

"You don't look so sharp yourself Captain.I doubt commander Chakotay would want to sit next to you smelling like that."Harry burst out laughing along with the captain and what little crew was on the bridge.

"Damage report, Mr. Tuvok."Janeway took her seat and looked at the empty chair sitting next to her._I hope they come back soon, I never realized how quiet it is around here without my first officer and my best pilot. _

_Janeway had been so lost in her own thoughts she almost missed Tuvok's entire report._

"All decks have reported in.Minor injuries reported and a ruptured plasma conduit on deck 11.Lutenient Torres is on her way to fix it."Tuvok stated in his usual composed manner.

"I hope that's the last we see of the Naballan.Tuvok, continue at yellow alert, we don't need any more surprises."

"Aye Captain."Tuvok could see the strain on his captain's face.She never seemed to get enough sleep especially when there was some of her crew away from the ship.He thought about talking to her about it, but he knew it would be a moot conversation.Until the away team was back safe and sound on Voyager, she wouldn't relax.

"Maintain course we don't want to be too far off the mark when we rendezvous with the Flyer tomorrow.I'll be in my ready room."

***

_How do I always have so many damn reports to look over?If Chakotay were here, at least I could pawn some of them off on him._Janeway's thought of her first officer brought a slight smile back to her face. He'd been gone over two weeks and while she'd never admit it to anyone else, she missed him terribly.Things always seemed to get even crazier when one of the command team was away from the ship.In this case, they had been under constant attack from the pesky little Naballan.They were not really much of a threat, but just enough of an annoyance to give Janeway a two-week headache.Just twelve more hours and they could leave this area of space for good.

"Seven to the Captain."

Taking a deep sight, Janeway answered the hail."What can I do for you Seven?"

"It is past the time for our weekly Velocity game.Has it been rescheduled?"

"I'm sorry Seven, I just forgot, I'll meet you in a few minutes."At first, she thought to cancel the game, but then she looked at all the reports in front of her and decided that Velocity had a much better appeal than a bunch of stupid reports that Starfleet would probably never see anyway._Besides, I think I'll just save them for Chakotay, it's his turn not mine._With a smile firmly in place, she left the ready room and headed for holo-deck two.

***

"Captain, you must be distracted today, I've scored the last four points and you haven't commented on it.Is everything alright?"

"Everything's fine Seven, maybe I was just being nice and letting you get ahead.I wouldn't want an unhappy ex Borg running around my ship.That could be dangerous."Janeway had just scored two points while distracting Seven's attention.She had known exactly what she was doing.

"You are cheating Captain.Distracting your opponent is not the fair way to gain points."Janeway took a flying dive and blasted the disk before it smashed into the side of her head.Jumping to her feet, she got off another shot that tied the score.

"It worked didn't it?Besides, it's not my fault you are so easily distracted."They both went after the last shot when Janeway's com-badge interrupted them with the Doctor's hail.Seven got the last shot and won the game.

"You are easily distracted Captain."Seven had a smirk plastered on her face.

Janeway was laughing as she answered the hail."What is it Doctor?"

"I need you to come to sickbay immediately."All smiles were gone as she felt a sense of panic creep into her.

"What's happened Doctor?"She was already headed for the door with Seven, right behind her. 

"Lieutenant Torres has been injured."

"How bad is it?"

"I'll explain when you get here, just hurry."Dread washed through her at the tone of the Doctor's voice.He rarely sounded so concerned.Janeway and Seven ran the rest of the way to sickbay.Janeway didn't slow down until she bolted through the doors and skidded to a halt at the sight of her chief engineer.She had to fight back the churning in her stomach.

"What happened?"Her voice was just above a whisper as she slowly made her way to the bio-bed where what was left of B'Elanna lay perfectly still, barely breathing.

"She was working on a ruptured conduit with Lieutenant Vorik when it exploded."Janeway hadn't noticed that there was someone else on the next bio-bed.She turned her panic stricken expression toward the Doctor, mostly to avert her gaze from the charred body in front of her."Lieutenant Vorik will be fine.B'Elanna took the worst of the blast trying to push him out of the way.She has third-degree plasma burns over 90% of her body.Her lungs have been burned so badly, I don't know how she's even breathing at all. 

Janeway's eyes filled with tears as she looked at her chief engineer and dear friend.Her body was charred and black, the flesh had burned right through to the bone on her legs and arms.The ridges on her forehead were no longer visible, and her hair had been burned off, leaving just a few short strands behind her ears.The churning in her stomach intensified with the smell of cooked flesh and metal.Janeway had to put her hand over her mouth to fight back the overwhelming nausea.Seven had put her arm around her captain and helped her away from the horrific sight.She gratefully sat down and took the glass of water the Doctor had brought.After taking a few gulps, she managed to swallow the lump in her throat.

"Can you save her Doctor?"

"I don't know Captain.I can repair most of the damage to her burnt flesh, but her lungs can't hold enough air to keep her alive.From all medical aspects, her body is dead."

_How will I ever be able to explain to Tom when he gets back that I let his wife die?__This just can't be happening._"Doctor, we cannot let her die, I won't except that.After all the disasters we've managed to get through, a ruptured conduit isn't going to take the life of my chief engineer and friend.You have to do something."Janeway was on the verge of hysteria at that point.The Doctor didn't miss the panic in her eyes.He had one option, but it was very farfetched and he wasn't sure he should even mention it, but at the same time, how could he not.The loss of Lieutenant Torres would be devastating to a lot of people on the ship, him included. 

"Seven, would you excuse us, I need to talk to the Captain in private?"

"Of course Doctor.Captain, if you require my assistance, I'll be in engineering."Janeway just acknowledged Seven with a nod.

"Ok Doctor, what's you plan and how risky is it?"

"I'll be honest Captain, it's very risky and I don't know what chance it will even have of working."

"Any chance at all is worth trying Doctor, I won't let her die."

"You don't always have a choice Captain.I think you better hear me out first, death may be the best option."

"I told you, that is NOT an option."Janeway got up and started pacing.Her nerves were frayed and her heart was breaking.

"Do you remember when my Vidian friend Denara Pel was onboard and I transferred her consciousness, or in her case her synaptic patterns into a holographic image of herself?"

"Of course I remember.Are you saying you can do the same with B'Elanna until you can heal her body?"

"Yes and no.I could transfer her conscious mind, but not into a holographic image.Lieutenant Torres's condition is much worse than Denara's ever was.Besides, it wouldn't work the same way.B'Elanna's half Klingon makes the outcome a bit different."

"Then just what are you saying Doctor?Her consciousness, or synaptic patterns, or whatever the hell you want to call it, have to be put somewhere.If not a holo-image, then where?"The moment she said it, she knew the answer before it came out of his mouth.

"Another living being."

"Is that possible?How could two minds co-exist in the same body?"

"It has been done before, but not under these circumstances and not with a half Klingon. It might not even work at all and it could harm the other person as well, even kill them.Captain, this is a long shot at best and we don't even have another Klingon onboard. I don't know if there is even another person who could or would be compatible."Without hesitation, Janeway knew she would do it if at all possible.

"Well, I can take care of the who could, now you just need to make sure it works Doctor."

"Captain, you can't be serious.This ship and crew need their captain.I'm not willing to risk the life of the captain of this ship to save the chief engineer."

"It's my life to risk Doctor.I'm not about to sit here and watch B'Elanna die if there is even the slightest chance that I can do something to help her."

"It doesn't have to be you Captain, we can find someone else to do this."

"There is no one else and you know that.I'm just as pigheaded as B'Elanna so I'm sure I know what I'll be up against.Besides, I'm the captain it's my responsibility to protect the crew and if that means giving my life to save one of them, that's just what I'll do."It was the Doctor who was pacing now.He couldn't have looked or felt more frustrated if he'd been a living, breathing person instead of a hologram.

"You are right about one thing Captain, you are pigheaded, but that pigheadedness could get you killed."

"Maybe, but it could also save B'Elanna's life and I think that's worth the risk."

"If this works and you both survive, I hope B'Elanna will realize what a sacrifice her captain is making."Janeway put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a wink.

"Don't worry Doctor, I won't let her forget.Now, let's get on with it."

"I'm going to need about an hour to get things set up and to get B'Elanna ready for the transfer."He still looked too unhappy about the whole thing.Janeway felt sorry for him.If this didn't work and they both ended up dead, he'd never forgive himself and would probably shut down his program.Janeway tried a bit of humor to ease the situation.

"Look at it this way Doctor, if this doesn't work the ship will be a lot more quiet."

"Not funny Captain and even worse than that, I'd have to live with Commander Chakotay and Mr. Paris."

"Ouch!That could be tough.I guess we'd better make sure this works then.I'll be back in less then twenty minutes.I'd better turn the ship over to Tuvok and let him know the situation."She was already heading for the door.

"Maybe his logic can talk you out of this."

"Not a chance."Janeway called back to him as she left sickbay.

_Pigheaded woman. _He mumbled under his breath as he set about getting things ready for the hardest procedure he'd ever done yet.If this worked, he'd be the most sought after Doctor in Starfleet, well once they made it back home that is.

***

"Are you ready Captain?"The Doctor had explained everything he could think of and had given Janeway a sedative to relax her.She was lying on the bio-bed next to B'Elanna's.The Doctor had already put B'Elanna in a stasis field.Janeway closed her eyes fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill.She was a lot more nervous than she'd ever admit to anyone.She didn't regret what she was about to do, just that she had to face this without her friend and first officer.If it didn't work, she'd never see him again and that's what frightened her the most.She hadn't noticed the Doctor had taken her hand."We don't have to go through with this Captain."

"Yes we do Doctor."She gave his hand a squeeze in return."I trust you, now get on it."

"Aye Captain."He managed a slight smile for both their sakes."Remember Captain when you wake up your mind will be in for a shock and B'Elanna will have no idea what has happened.It will be total chaos at first, worse than a Borg assimilation."

"Goodie, I can feel the headache already." The Doctor put a hypo to her neck.Janeway's eyes drifted closed.

"That will be the least of your problems Captain."That was the last thing she heard as her mind drifted into unconsciousness. 

Two Hours Later

This time the hypo that the Doctor put to Janeway's neck was to wake her up.She slowly opened one eye then the other, trying to clear the fogginess from her mind.It took a few more moments for her to remember where she was and what had just happened.She didn't feel any different and a sense of panic shot through her.She bolted up to a sitting position, letting the sheet fall half-way from her small frame.

"Captain, calm down, it's ok."

"B'Elanna!Where's B'Elanna, I can't hear her."Before the Doctor could answer, Janeway felt a sudden jolt of pain shoot through her head causing a tingling sensation throughout her entire body."Doctor!"

"Take it easy Captain, just breath deeply and let it happen.B'Elanna is just trying to wake up.I told you it was going to be a shock for you, not to mention the shock it will be for Lieutenant Torres."Janeway closed her eyes again trying to control the strange feeling rushing through her.She had a sudden sense of claustrophobia and she opened her mouth to say something, but it wasn't her words that came out.It was her voice just not her words.

_"HEY, THESE AREN'T MY BOOBS!"_

"No, they're mine."Janeway pulled the sheet up around her trying to glare at the Doctor, but finding it difficult to take control over the slightest movement. 

_"What the hell is going on?Where am I, who am I?"_It was Janeway's voice in a total panic, but the words were coming from B'Elanna.The Doctor was having a hard time keeping a straight face.The whole scene was quite comical.

"Doctor, say something!I don't know how to explain this."

"I'm not sure how to either Captain."

_"Well one of you better tell me what the hell is going on.Gods, my head is killing me."_

"It's not your head, it's mine and yes it's killing me.Doctor, can't you give me something for the headache?"

"I'm afraid not Captain, B'Elanna."The Doctor suddenly started laughing, he couldn't help it.The Captain, or rather B'Elanna was inspecting her body, the room, everything.He knew that B'Elanna was totally confused and that the captain was about to choke him, but he just couldn't help laughing at them both.

"DOCTOR!"He wasn't sure which one had said it, but he stopped laughing immediately and tried to take control of the situation.

"Both of you need to calm down."

_"Calm down!I feel like I'm back on the barge of the dead."_That thought put a shock to B'Elanna's mind.She almost had herself convinced that she really was dead until she heard Janeway's voice in her mind.

_B'Elanna, please relax.You're not dead, well not exactly. _Janeway's body slumped back on the bio-bed.It was a very unsettling feeling for Janeway to not have control over what her body was doing."B'Elanna, would you stop doing that?"

_"Doing what?Doctor, please help me, I've gone mad."_

"Not quite Lieutenant.Just lie still, both of you and I'll try to explain."Janeway's eyes closed and this time it was her, doing so."B'Elanna, you were in an accident.Do you remember any of it?"

_"I was working with Vorik on the ruptured conduit and it was about to explode.I remember trying to push him out of the way, but that's all I remember."_

"You did manage to get him clear of the worst of the blast, but you weren't so lucky.Your body and lungs were damaged severely."

_"I don't like the sound of this Doctor."_B'Elanna started to move Janeway's body off the bio-bed but stopped suddenly at the sight next to her.Janeway's eyes had focused on the charred body next to her.

"B'Elanna!Don't look, just close my eyes and let us explain."The Doctor caught Janeway as her body staggered toward him.He helped her back onto the bio-bed and placed another hypo to her neck."Doctor, what's happened?I can't feel her anymore."

"I think she's just passed out from the shock of seeing her own body.The sedative should help both of you relax."

"Doctor, this is a bit more difficult than I thought it would be.Are you sure she's going to be alright?"

"I'm not sure of anything at this point Captain.It's not like I do this everyday."

"Well it's a first for me too."

_Tom, Tom where are you?Tom._

"I think she's coming around again Doctor."

"How do you know?"Just then, Janeway let out a blood-curdling scream that filled sickbay and echoed throughout the ship.The shocking scream coming from her own voice made Janeway's head pound and her heart race."B'Elanna, please calm down and I'll explain.You're going to cause both you and the captain more pain if you don't relax."The Doctor had to physically restrain her by holding her down on the bio-bed.

_B'Elanna please, you're hurting me.You have to calm down or we're both going to die._Slowly Janeway's body stopped thrashing against the Doctor and her breathing returned back to normal.

"Lieutenant, I can fix the damage to your body, but not while you are in it.Your body couldn't sustain your life but you conscious mind or synaptic patterns were in-tact.This was the only way to try and save your life."

_"Just what is this Doctor?You can't possibly be saying what I think you're saying."_

"That's exactly what I'm saying Lieutenant.You are in the captain's body, and if not for her, you would be on that barge of dead, for good."

_"This is impossible."_

"Maybe, but the impossible has happened and we need to work together to get through this.I couldn't just let you die B'Elanna."

_"Why not, I don't think I can live in this body.It just doesn't feel right."_

"Well it's no picnic for me either Lieutenant.You're just going to have to deal with it, and stop trying to take over, it's my body and I'll tell it what to do, understood?"

_"Oh, so I'm just supposed to float around in your head and not do anything."_

"Exactly, I'm the captain."

_"Well for the moment, so am I."_B'Elanna, in Janeway's voice busted out laughing which caused the Doctor to do the same.Watching a conversation between two people going on, but only seeing one person was very amusing.If anyone would have come in to sickbay and witnessed the scene, they would have thought their captain had gone mad.

_Damnit B'Elanna, stop laughing so I can say something._

_Sorry._Suddenly, the Doctor found he was the only one laughing.He received the death glare, which he had no doubt was from the captain._You just gave him the death glare didn't you?This might be fun after all._

_Don't count on it Lieutenant.I'm already regretting saving your butt.This old body isn't big enough for both of us and I was here first._

_Old and scrawny._

_Oh, that's it._"Doctor, I changed my mind.Get her out of me now!"

"Sorry Captain, you volunteered to do this, now you'll just have to learn to live with Lieutenant Torres and her many fine attributes."

_"I hope you meant that as a compliment Doctor."_

"Of course Lieutenant."B'Elanna and the Doctor both started laughing again.Janeway's headache was intensifying.

"Would you two shut the hell up so I can think."Janeway put her hands over her eyes, hoping to block out reality.

_"Hey, don't cover my eyes I can't see."_

"They're my eyes and I'll cover them up if I want."

_"Doctor, get me out of here.I don't think I'll survive inside the captain.She's too pigheaded to share."_

"I'm pigheaded am I?You're right Doctor, we should have just let her die.I make the ultimate sacrifice and this is what I get for it.What was I thinking?"

"As I recall Captain, you were thinking about how much B'Elanna means to you and everyone on this ship.You were thinking that her life was more important than yours and you would do anything to save her."

_Kathryn, you really said that about me?_

_No, it must have been some other captain of Voyager._

_I'm really touched; I don't know what to say._

_Good, then be quiet for a few minutes so we can figure this out._

_Yes Ma'am._

"Are you going to say something Captain, or Lieutenant?"

"Sorry Doctor, we forgot you were even here."

"This is going to be an interesting forty eight hours to say the least.I'm glad I'll be stuck in sickbay working my magic on Lieutenant Torres's body so I won't have to deal with either one of you."

_"Come on Captain, let's get out of here and leave Mr. Magic to his work.I want my body to be as good as new when he's done with it."_B'Elanna slid off the bio-bed and started for the door.

"B'Elanna, stop!I'm not even, I mean we're not even dressed."B'Elanna stopped Janeway's legs and started to laugh again.

_"I guess it would be quite a shock for the crew to see this scrawny old body roaming the ship with no clothes on."_

"Oh, you are really pushing it my friend.I'm not old or scrawny.Show us a little respect would ya?The Delta Quadrant has taken its tole on me, not to mention what you're doing to me."Janeway had taken control of her body and headed back in to get dressed.

_I'll say it's taken a tole on you.Your boobs are a hell of a lot saggier than mine._At least B'Elanna had the good sense to make that comment silently.Janeway started laughing again and the Doctor had no way of knowing why, or who it was that was laughing.His better judgment once again saved him from commenting. 

Janeway dressed quickly and headed again for the door to sickbay._"One good thing about this, I get to hang out in the captain's uniform for the next forty eight hours." _Janeway stopped suddenly and turned back to the Doctor.

"Thirty six hours Doctor, not a minute longer.That's an order."They walked out the door missing the Doctor's comment, which was just as well.

***

_"Did you see the look on Neelix's face as we marched by?"_

"Of course I saw it, they're my eyes, remember?He probably thinks I've finally lost my mind.I'm sure within a few minutes the whole ship will have been informed of my insanity."They had managed to make it back to Janeway's quarters without killing each other in the process.

_"One thing's for sure, we're going to have to compromise on who has control over what part of your body.We can't keep walking the halls of the ship saying left, right, left.Hell, I'm living in you and I think you're crazy."_

"When did you become such a comedian Lieutenant?"

_"Oh I don't know, maybe about an hour ago.How else am I supposed to deal with this crazy situation?My body is dead, I'm living inside my captain, and there's not a damn thing I can do about it but laugh.The whole thing is too bizarre to do anything else."_

"I agree with you on that one.This is by far the most bizarre thing that's happened yet on this ship.I didn't think I could still be surprised, how wrong I was."

_"Kathryn, I don't think I'll ever be able to thank you for doing this.No one else, I mean no one has ever cared enough about me to…"_

"You have a lot more friends on this ship than you think B'Elanna, and don't start crying, I don't want my eyes all red and puffy.Besides, I happen to know a pilot on this ship who is madly in love with you."

_"Yea, Tom is the best thing that's ever happened to me, well besides hanging out inside the captain that is."_

"Don't start B'Elanna, I may love you, but this is a bit too close for comfort."This time they both started laughing."Ok, enough of this, I need a shower."

_"I'll say, you, I mean we stink.What were you doing before I invaded your body, playing Velocity with Seven?"_Janeway had walked into her bathroom, shedding her clothes in the process.

"That's just what I was doing.Now, if you don't want to watch this stinky old scrawny body, take a shower, then I suggest you take a nap or something cause we're going in."

_"I suppose I can handle it, I've seen worse. One time when Tom and I were…"_

"B'Elanna!I don't think my stomach can take it.Don't think it, don't say it."

_"OK, ok, but speaking of stomachs, I'm starving, or you're starving.Can we eat after we shower?"_

"B'Elanna, you're impossible."

_"I've been told that before." _The laughter continued as the two, or the one took a nice hot shower.

***

_"Captain, I don't know how you do it."_

"Just what are you talking about Lieutenant?"

_"How do you get any sleep with the way you snore?I've never heard anything like it."_

"B'Elanna, I do not snore and for your information, that wasn't me making all that damn noise, it was you snoring.I hardly got any sleep at all."

_"Sorry Captain, but it was you and I can prove it."_

"No you can't because I don't snore."Janeway was already on her second cup of coffee and she'd only been up for fifteen minutes.

_"It's your body Captain, so that horrific noise came out of you.I'm just a visitor."_B'Elanna received a few colorful words through Janeway's thoughts._"Hey, don't call me that.Gees Captain, I didn't even know you knew such language, and it was too you that snored all night."_Janeway didn't bother to respond, she just kept sipping on her coffee._"How can you drink so much of that stuff?It taste worse than rotten ground-up Leolaroot.Can't you at least put some sugar and cream in it?"_

"No, I like it black thank you.If you don't like it, then don't taste it."

_"What great advice from our intrepid captain.Wish I'd have thought of it."_

"B'Elanna, would you shut up?I like a bit of peace and quiet first thing in the mornings and you are neither peaceful, or quiet."

_"Well excuse me!I usually have someone much more pleasant to talk to in the mornings.What a grouch!"_

"I am not a grouch.Now are you ready to go and face the day?"

_"Yes, I won't forget what you told me.Keep my mouth shut, no strange movements and you are the captain.Does that about cover it?"_

"I'm glad to see you were paying attention Lieutenant."Janeway put her coffee cup down, and they headed for the door.

_"You are too a grouch, and you snore."_Unfortunately, B'Elanna had made that comment aloud just as they entered the corridor and three crewmen were passing by.The three just gave Janeway a strange look, but didn't dare stop to ask who, or what she was talking to.B'Elanna was doing everything in her power not to laugh, but it was impossible.She busted out laughing in Janeway's voice causing the three crewmen to turn back around and glare at Janeway.B'Elanna received another round of profanity through Janeway's thoughts.Poor B'Elanna was trying so hard to control her laughter that the tears were pooling in Janeway's eyes.

"Captain, is everything alright?"One of the crewmen got up the nerve to ask.

"Yes, I'm just fine, thank you.You'd better get going before you're late for duty."

"Yes Ma'am."They all three turned and hurried toward the turbo-lift."

_B'Elanna, you are about to find you consciousness or synaptic patterns or whatever the hell you are right now floating in space.Not one more word, understood?_

_Aye Captain, sorry._

_Hell, my head hurts.You are by far the biggest headache of my life.Maybe the Doctor can give me something.We're gong to sickbay first._B'Elanna just kept quiet as she was told.Janeway was grateful for the silence.

***

"Captain, Lieutenant, how are you feeling this morning?"

"How do you think I'm feeling?I've got the worst headache known to man and a half Klingon that won't shut up."Janeway had hopped up on the bio-bed as the Doctor ran his tricorder over her.

"Everything seams to be doing good Captain.All your vital signs are normal.How are you feeling Lieutenant?"He didn't receive an answer."Hello, B'Elanna, are you in there?"

_B'Elanna, answer him._

_I can't, you said I couldn't say a word. _The Doctor started to look worried.

"Captain, what's happened?Is she alright?"

"She's fine Doctor, for now.She's just being a baby."

_"I am not!You just don't know how to have fun and you drink too much coffee.My stomach hurts."_

"Glad to hear you're alive Lieutenant.You had me worried for a minute."The Doctor put a hypospray to Janeway's neck."This should help your stomach Lieutenant.Captain, you really do drink too much of that poison."Janeway just rolled her eyes at the EMH.

"Would both of you just back off please?Doctor, how much longer until B'Elanna's body is finished?I don't think I can take this much longer."

"At least another twenty-four hours Captain.It's not that easy to reconstruct all of her burnt skin.I'm working as fast as I can."Janeway suddenly felt a sense of panic coming from B'Elanna.The sight of seeing her body lying on the bio-bed in such a state must have been horrible.

"Oh B'Elanna, I'm sorry.I don't mean to be such a grouch, I can't imagine how hard this has been on you."

_"It's not your fault Captain.It's just so hard seeing myself like that, and yet it's not me.This whole thing is just too weird to believe."_

"We'll get through this, we just have to hang in a bit longer."Once again, the Doctor found it fascinating watching the conversation between two people in one body.He couldn't wait to start work on his report for the bigwigs at Starfleet medical.This would be the most talked about case for century's to come.

_"Doctor, can we go now, my stomach is feeling better."_

"You mean my stomach, and it was just fine before, you just complain too much."

"Now, don't start, either one of you.Yes you can go, just stay in touch and don't kill each other."

"Doctor, I'll do my best."Janeway and B'Elanna walked as one out of sickbay.

***

_Now remember B'Elanna, be good and keep quiet._

_Yes Ma'am._The doors to the turbo-lift opened and Janeway took a deep breath and stepped out.

"Good morning Captain."

"Ensign Kim."Janeway gave him a slight nod as she walked down to her command chair."Anything to report Ensign?"

"All quiet Captain.No sign of our friends.All systems are running smoothly.The Delta Flyer has reported in and they'll be in range in less than twelve hours."

_"Yes!"_B'Elanna was so excited she forgot where she was and who she was.Janeway found herself on her feet and running toward Harry.

_B'Elanna, stop!_Janeway skidded to a stop just before reaching Harry, who was looking a bit shocked at his captain's actions.

"Captain, are you alright?" Harry wasn't sure what else to say.

"I'm just fine Ensign.I'm just glad they will be back soon."Janeway slowly turned back toward her chair trying to save what little dignity she had left.Just as she sat down, she let out the loudest, most disgusting belch she had ever heard.It echoed off the bulkheads of the ship.

_B'Elanna!You are dead._

_It's not my fault it was the coffee.I told you not to drink so much._

"Good one Captain.That was even better than one of B'Elanna's."Harry just couldn't help it, he was laughing so hard he was doubled over at his station.Little did he know how accurate he was.B'Elanna tried not to, she really did, but she busted out laughing along with everyone who was on the bridge to witness their captain at her best.There was nothing Janeway could do but go along for the ride.

_B'Elanna, you are going to pay big time for this._Janeway managed to get control of her legs enough to stagger toward the ready room.She didn't even bother to try and speak through all the laughter.She just left the bridge not turning it over to anyone, not that there was a sane person left on the bridge to turn command over to anyway. 

"B'Elanna, what in the hell are you trying to do to me.You've managed in the last twelve hours to cause this entire crew to lose all respect for their captain." 

_"They haven't lost respect for you Captain, if anything they will love you even more for being just like everyone else."_

"B'Elanna, that's one thing you are not.You are in a class all your own, unfortunately now I'm stuck in that class with you.I'll never be able to even look at Harry again without wondering what he's thinking about me."__Janeway headed for the replicator."Coffee, black."

_"Kathryn, you better not drink that unless you want a repeat performance of that belch."_Janeway stopped just before the cup was at her lips.

"You wouldn't dare."

_"I don't think you want to find out Captain.How about some nice cold water instead?"_

"Fine, you win, but you'd better think of a way to apologize to Harry, and everyone else on the ship."

_"Well I don't know about everyone, but you could promote Harry to Lieutenant, that should make him happy."_

"Oh I have a better idea.Why don't I just promote him to chief engineer, I have it on good authority that the job will be open soon."B'Elanna, and Janeway started laughing.

_"Good one Captain, see you can be funny."_

"Who's joking Lieutenant?Now, see that very large pile of reports on my desk?"

_"Of course I see them, they're your eyes, remember."_

"Well, this is one instance where two heads are better than one."

_"Are you nuts!I hate reports."_

"Too bad, and yes I am nuts or I wouldn't be in this mess in the first place.Now get on it, that's an order Lieutenant."

_"Yes Ma'am."What a bunch of stupid Starfleet bullshit reports._

"I heard that Lieutenant."

_"Sorry, I must have forgot my mind, or rather where my mind is."_

"Apology accepted, now be quiet and get busy."

***

"Ensign Kim, is the Captain in her ready room?"

"Yea Seven she's in there, but she's been acting a little strange this morning.I don't think she's feeling herself today."

"I am well aware of who she's feeling like Ensign.I'll just go and make sure she's alright."Without another word, Seven headed for the ready room, leaving Harry even more puzzled than he'd been before.Commander Tuvok didn't bother to elaborate on the situation either.

"Captain, Lieutenant, I have the latest Astrometrics report."

_"Goodie, that's all we need is another damn report."_

"Captain?"

"Sorry Seven.B'Elanna, be quiet.Let's see the report."Seven handed the Captain the Padd.

"According to our scans of the entire region, the Naballan have gone for good.There is no sign of them within our long range sensors."Janeway was rubbing at her throbbing head.

"Well at least that's some good news.Is there anything else?"

"No Captain, but can I say you don't look too good." 

"You just said it, so I guess so."

_"Gee Seven, you are so kind.Don't you ever have anything nice to say?"_

"B'Elanna, stay out of it."

"I do feel sorry for you Captain.Even millions of Borg voices in your head would be better than one Klingon."Janeway was smiling, but B'Elanna was growling.

_"Just what the hell is that supposed to mean you Borg bit…"_

"B'Elanna!That's enough, both of you."Janeway shot Seven the death glare, which didn't faze her in the least.

"I think it was self explanatory Lieutenant.Even if I were still a Borg, I wouldn't want to assimilate you because I wouldn't want you in my head."Before Janeway could react, B'Elanna had leaped over the desk in full Klingon rage ready to strangle Seven.

"B'Elanna!Stop!"Seven had managed to duck out of the way, which caused Janeway to hit the deck of the ready room.Janeway let out a groan, rolling over and putting her hands over her aching head.

"Seven to the Doctor, emergency in the captain's ready room.I think Lieutenant Torres has driven the captain mad."

"I'll be right there."A few seconds later, the Doctor materialized in the ready room.He was instantly on his knees putting a hypo to the captain's neck."Captain, can you hear me, are you alright?"

"Yes I can hear you Doctor, and no I'm not alright."The Doctor was running his medical-tricorder over her.

"It doesn't appear that anything's broken Captain.What's been going on in here?"

"Don't ask me, why don't you ask my Klingon half and her Borg friend?I'm just the lucky recipient of their fun and games." 

"Lieutenant, care to explain?"The Doctor wasn't happy with this new situation.He was trying to do his best to save B'Elanna's life and didn't have time to play this game.

_"No, my head hurts."_

"It's my head that hurts, no thanks to you Lieutenant."

_"Hey, don't blame this one on me, your Borg friend started it."_

"I was only speaking the truth Lieutenant, just like Captain Janeway has always taught me."

"Seven!"They all three said at once.It was the Doctor who finished.

"Seven, I think you'd better leave, you're not helping the situation at all."Seven turned on her heels and left the ready room without another word.The Doctor helped Janeway to her feet and over to the couch."Is your head feeling any better now?"

"Yes, but I'm feeling a bit dizzy."

"That's just an effect from the medication.You're going to be groggy for a few hours, which is probably for the best.Why don't you just lie here and get a few hours of rest.I'll inform Commander Tuvok not to disturb you."

"Thanks Doctor, but what happened to B'Elanna, I can't hear her anymore?"

"I'm sure she's already asleep.The medication works rather quickly Captain."Janeway didn't respond as she had fallen asleep also.The Doctor just smiled to himself as he put a blanket over them and left the ready room in silence.

***

_Captain, wake up.Captain, we have to go, wakeup._

_B'Elanna, go away, I'm sleeping._Janeway rolled over on the couch in her ready room, hoping to ignore the other voice in her head.

_I can't go away, I'm stuck in here and we have to go, now!I can't move your body without your help.Now get up._

_No, I don't have to go anywhere, just a few more minutes of sleep, now be quiet._

_Fine, just pee your paints.You thought the belch was embarrassing wait till you walk out of here in wet paints._

_Oh for hell sakes, I don't have to go that bad._

_Yes you do, now get up.You shouldn't have drank all that coffee._Janeway's body started moving without her say so.

"Fine!"Janeway screamed out.She made her way to bathroom and wisely enough B'Elanna kept quiet.A few minutes later Janeway was back at the replicator ordering more coffee."Feel better now Lieutenant?"She started to sip on her life saving liquid. 

_"Well I did until you started drinking that crap again.You really are impossible to live with Captain."_

"If you don't like the living arrangements, get out."

_"I wish I could, I hate this whole thing.I feel so, not me.I miss Tom."_Janeway could feel her eyes start to tear up.

"B'Elanna, don't cry.It won't be much longer and Tom will be back in just a few hours.Besides, according to Seven, I already look like hell so I don't need red-puffy eyes to make me look even worse."

_"I'm not crying, and Seven is a pig."_

"Don't start with Seven, and if you weren't crying, why am I wiping my eyes?"

_"They're your eyes, don't ask me, maybe you have allergies."_

"That must be it.Come on let's go get some lunch to go with this coffee.That should make you feel better."

_"I'm right behind you, or rather a bit closer."_Janeway was laughing as she left the ready room.Tuvok just gave her a nod as she passed by his tactical station.Janeway stopped before she reached the turbo-lift.

"Tuvok, we'll be in the mess hall if you need me.B'Elanna's hungry again."

"I'm glad to see you have to eat Captain.Maybe having a companion with you is a good thing."Janeway just rolled her eyes as she entered the lift.B'Elanna was laughing.

"Don't start, either one of you."The doors closed just as Tuvok was about to protest.B'Elanna was still laughing.

_"See, I told you, you are too scrawny."_

"I think your exact words were, old and scrawny."

_"My mistake Captain."_

***

It was quite late in the afternoon so most of the crew had already eaten lunch and it was still too early for dinner.Janeway was grateful for the sparse amount of people in the mess hall.She had chosen a table over by the view-port and B'Elanna had about three times too much food heaped in front of them."B'Elanna, there's no way I'll ever be able to eat all of this.It's still my stomach even if it's your appetite."

_"Don't worry, I'll stop when we're full."_Before Janeway could comment, B'Elanna shoved a big fork full of food into their mouth.

_You're the pig Lieutenant._

_Yup._They just kept eating and didn't notice Harry walking over to them.

"Captain, may I join you?"

_B'Elanna, keep you mouth shut._"Sure Harry, have a seat, I'll do my best not to embarrass myself this time."Harry pulled up a chair as he started laughing again.

"Don't worry about it Captain, we're all human."Janeway just smiled as B'Elanna tried her damnedest not to laugh."You must be hungry Captain, I've never seen you eat so much food before."B'Elanna lost all control.Janeway could feel it coming, but could do nothing to stop her counterpart.The laughter erupted.Harry just watched his captain with a bit of concern in his eyes.

_"Harry my friend, you're alright.I think I'll just promote you to Lieutenant.I think you've waited long enough."_Harry's jaw dropped to the deck.

_Damnit B'Elanna, what are you doing?_

_Oh, lighten Captain I'm just having some fun with poor Harry, besides he really does need a promotion._

_That's not for you to decide Lieutenant, unless you want to be demoted to Ensign._Harry was still in shock.

"Did you mean that Captain?"

"Of course not Harry, I mean I did, but not."

"I don't understand Captain."

_Neither do I Captain.Which is it, do or don't?_

"B'Elanna, I've just about had it with you."Now, Harry looked even more confused.He was looking around for B'Elanna, but she was nowhere in sight.

"Captain, what are you talking about?B'Elanna isn't even here.Are you sure you're alright?"B'Elanna busted out laughing again; but Harry only saw it as the Captain laughing hysterically.He looked like he was about ready to bolt to get away from his crazed captain.

_Maybe you'd better tell him the truth Captain._

_You don't leave me a hell of a lot of choice do you Lieutenant?_"Harry, there's something you need to know.Lieutenant Torres is right here with us."

"What are you talking about Captain?I don't see her anywhere."

"She's here, inside of me."This time Harry's jaw dropped beyond the deck and out into space.

"Maybe I'd better get you to sickbay Captain.Something is wrong with you."

_B'Elanna, I could use a little help here._

_Ok, ok."Hey Starfleet, It's really me."_Harry rubbed his eyes in total confusion.

"See Ensign, I would never talk to you like that.B'Elanna really is inside with me.The Doctor had to transfer her consciousness into me until he could repair all the damage to her body, and it wasn't me who let out that disgusting belch on the bridge earlier."

_"See Starfleet, you were right all along.That was as good as mine because it was mine."_Again, B'Elanna couldn't hold back the laughter.The look of shock on poor Harry's face was worth all this trouble, and then some.

"This is the craziest thing I've ever heard of.How is it possible?"

"I'll spare you the details Ensign, but believe me it's the craziest thing I've ever done."

_"Yes, but you love me and you know it Captain.What would you do without me?"_

"At this point Lieutenant, I'd like to find out."This time it was Harry who started laughing.He was finding this as comical as the Doctor had."Stop laughing Harry, it's not funny."

"Not funny!This is the funniest thing that's happened yet on this ship.I wish Tom was here to see it."Just then, Janeway's com-badge chirped.

"Tuvok to Janeway.The Flyer will be arriving in ten minutes.I thought you'd like to meet them in the shuttle-bay."

"Understood thank you Tuvok, Janeway out."

_"Looks like you're about to get your wish Harry.Come on Captain, I've got a husband to greet."_

"Hold on B'Elanna, Tom isn't going to understand this.You're going to scare the Hell out of him."

"Captain, can I please come with you?I wouldn't want to miss this for a Borg conduit to the Alpha Quadrant."Janeway, with B'Elanna's insistent help was already heading for the door.

"Why not, it's going to be one crazy scene."Harry ran to catch up to them.

"Captain, I just have one more question, do I get that promotion or not?"

"Not!"

_"Sorry Harry, I tried."_They all three continued laughing as they walked to the shuttle-bay.

***

"B'Elanna, would you quit with the pacing around.You're driving me nuts."

_"Sorry Captain, I'm just excited to see Tom."_Harry started laughing again._"What are you laughing at now Starfleet?"_

"This is by far the funniest thing I've seen in the Delta Quadrant.Captain, how long does B'Elanna get to stay inside you?I hope for a while longer, this could be good for ship morale."

"Ensign Kim, while I'm glad we are so entertaining, the sooner I get rid of my sidekick, the better.Maybe you'd like to have a half Klingon in your head who never shuts up and eats like a pig."

"No thank you Captain.I'll just enjoy it from a distance."

"Coward."Harry wasn't sure which one had said it, but chose not to ask.The Flyer had docked and the bay was depressurizing.

_"Oh com on hurry up already."_

"B'Elanna, I think you're forgetting something.Tom isn't going to even see you so you're going to have to calm down or you'll scare him half to death."Before Janeway got a comment out of B'Elanna, or an inkling of what was about to happen, B'Elanna, in Janeway's body took off running toward Tom as he exited the Flyer.

_"Tom, Tom!"_Too late, B'Elanna had flung herself, or Janeway into Tom's arms.

_B'Elanna, stop!_Janeway screamed into B'Elanna's mind.It didn't faze her in the least.She had planted her lips onto Tom's, kissing him very deeply and passionately._B'Elanna, for god's sakes, stop!_They hadn't noticed that Chakotay had come out of the Flyer just standing in total shock at the scene in front of him.Harry Kim was laughing hysterically._B'Elanna please, I think I'm going to be sick._Finally, Tom managed to push the captain off of him.His look of total surprise mirrored Chakotay's.

_Sorry Captain._

_Oh, you're going to be Lieutenant._Janeway had back up from Tom and was wiping her mouth.She glanced over at Chakotay and saw his horrified expression.It was almost funny, but right now, her only thought was how to kill her chief engineer.Tom was the first one to manage a word.

"Captain, I missed you too, but what the hell is going on?I mean the kiss was nice and all, but I'm a married man."

"I know that Mr. Paris."B'Elanna started laughing._B'Elanna, knock it off; you're just making this worse._

"This isn't funny Captain.What the hell is wrong with you?"Before she could get B'Elanna to stop laughing and get an answer out, Chakotay cut in.He was headed for the door.

"If you'll excuse me Captain.I've got some reports to work on."He was already out the door.

"Chakotay, wait!I can explain."He just continued down the corridor without a glance back."Now look what you've done Lieutenant.Chakotay thinks it was me kissing Tom."

"You were kissing me Captain, and who are you talking to?What is going on here?"By this time, Harry was rolling on the floor with laughter."Harry, what in the hell is wrong with you?Has the whole ship gone mad?"

"Probably, but we can explain this Tom.Harry, don't you have something better to do, like scrub the exhaust manifolds on deck twelve."

"Yes Ma'am."Harry ran out the door, still laughing.

'This should be good Captain."Tom folded his arms in front of him just waiting for the explanation.

_B'Elanna, I think that's your Que_, _and you better make it believable._

_"Tom, it's me B'Elanna.You can't tell me you didn't recognize that kiss.It's me, your wife, who else could kiss you like that?"_Tom did not look convinced.

"Apparently you Captain, I had know idea you were so, passionate."Tom received a slug on the arm from B'Elanna.This time it was Janeway who started laughing.

_This could be fun B'Elanna, you're doing great._

_"Well, why don't you help me out here?"_

_Sorry, three's a crowd._

"What did you hit me for Captain?It was a compliment."

_"I hit you, you stupid Flyboy, and I'll do it again if you don't pay attention.It really is me, your wife.I'm in here with the captain.Do I need to kiss you again to get you to believe me?"_

_Try it, and you are dead Lieutenant._

"By all means Captain, be my guest."This time it was Janeway who slugged him, even harder than B'Elanna had.

"Ouch!Would you stop doing that?"

"Not until you listen to us.B'Elanna is in here with me and it's no picnic either.Why in the hell would I kiss you like that?That was not me, come on Tom would I ever do something like that?"

"Hum, well now that I think about it, probably not.You won't even kiss Chakotay and we all know you love him."He was rewarded with another slug, which came from both of them this time."Would you stop doing that?"

_"Tom please, it really is me.If you come to sickbay, I can prove it."_

Tom just stood looking at Janeway as if trying to see inside her.He wasn't convinced, but he had a bad feeling about the whole thing.If his wife was really inside the captain, then what had happened to her while he was gone?That thought was the most disturbing of all.

"Tom, B'Elanna really is in here.It was the only way we could save her life."

_"Please Tom, just come with us to sickbay.The Doctor will be able to explain better than we can."_B'Elanna held Janeway's had out for him to take.He reluctantly took her hand.B'Elanna held tightly to Tom and this time Janeway felt how important the physical contact was.They walked out the door, hand in hand to sickbay.They received more than a few awkward glances as they passed some of the crew, but the three remained quiet, not wanting to even try to explain.

***

"Doctor, please tell me this isn't real?"Tom let go of Janeway's hand and rushed to the side of his wife lying on the bio-bed.The Doctor looked up, startled at the sound of his voice.

"Welcome back Mr. Paris, and I'm sorry to say it is all true."The Doctor had so far done a remarkable job on B'Elanna's body, which was a good thing Janeway noted.If Tom had seen the condition of his wife before he would have been impossible to reason with.As it was, he looked like he was about to faint.

_"Tom, come over here and sit down, you look like you've just seen a ghost."_B'Elanna helped her husband over to a chair and knelt down in front of him.Janeway remained quiet letting husband and wife work this out._"Tom, I was working on a ruptured conduit when it exploded.I was trying to push Vorik out of the way, but the blast caught me before I could move.I know how strange it is to see me lying there, believe me it's no picnic seeing yourself like that, but I look a hell of a lot better than I did.The Doctor's doing everything he can."_

"Lieutenant Paris, I can assure you I'll have your wife back together as soon as I can, but it's going to be awhile longer."

"How much longer Doctor?"Janeway cut in.

"I'm not sure Captain.It's taking longer than I had originally hoped.I'm doing everything I can."Janeway managed to pull herself away from Tom's grasp and started pacing around sickbay.She was rubbing her aching head as she paced.The Doctor followed her and scanned her again with his tricorder."Captain, how bad is the headache?"

"I can live with it, but not forever Doctor.This is a lot harder than I thought it would be, not to mention the gossip B'Elanna is causing."

_"Hey, it's not just me Captain.I couldn't have done it without you."_B'Elanna started laughing and was shortly joined by her husband.

"B'Elanna, it really is you in there."Tom jumped up and ran to B'Elanna, picking Janeway up and hugging her tightly.

"Tom, let go I can't breathe."He gently sat her back down on the ground, but didn't release his hold on her.

"Oh B'Elanna, thank god you're ok, well sort of."He moved in to claim Janeway's lips again.

"Mr. Paris, if you kiss me again, you won't see the outside of the brig for a hell of a long time."Tom stopped just as his lips touched hers.B'Elanna was laughing again.

"Sorry Captain, I just needed to show my wife how much I love her.This is so damn confusing."

_"No kidding Flyboy, try it from my side.You know, what I want to do with you right now."_Tom backed away from Janeway and started laughing again.

"Oh the possibilities, maybe we should try it."He gave them a devilish smile, which only rewarded him with another slug on the arm.He had no doubt, of whom it came from this time.B'Elanna was laughing; the Doctor was beside himself, he'd never had so much fun, and Janeway was fuming.

"All three of you are on report and B'Elanna, stop thinking what you are thinking, cause it's not going to happen, not with my body that is."The two men choked back their laughter.

_I'm sorry Captain, but it's not like you haven't been thinking the same thing, only with Chakotay._

"B'Elanna!"Janeway yelled out.

_Hey, I didn't say it out loud, your secret's safe with me._

"Captain, what's wrong, is B'Elanna alright?"

"No Mr. Paris, I'm going to kill her."

_"I said I was sorry Captain.You are such a grouch, are you sure you're not half Klingon?"_

"Well it would seem I am now, wouldn't it.Doctor, can't you give me more of that sedative so it will knock B'Elanna out until you finish her body?"

"I don't think that's a good idea Captain.I've already pushed our luck with the sedative I gave you earlier.It's not good for either one of you and I can't knock B'Elanna out without doing the same to you.I would suggest that you try and relax Captain, your heart rate and blood pressure are too high."Janeway slumped down into the chair that Tom had been sitting in.All fun and teasing had stopped they could all see how much they were hurting the captain, especially B'Elanna.

_Kathryn, I'm really sorry.I just don't know how else to deal with this I don't mean to hurt you.I owe you my life.Now don't you cry, you'll make our eyes puffy._B'Elanna's thoughts brought a genuine smile to Janeway's face.

_We can't have that now, can we Lieutenant._This time it was Tom who knelt down in front of his wife and his Captain with concern written on his face.He took hold of her hands and Janeway didn't try to pull away.

"I'm sorry Captain, B'Elanna.I just don't how to react to this either.I come home and find my wife isn't my wife, but she is and she's dead, but not.It's crazy."His eyes had misted over, which brought the compassion out in Janeway.She could also feel how much B'Elanna wanted to comfort her husband.Janeway and B'Elanna put her hands on Tom's cheeks and wiped the few tears away that had escaped.Looking into his moist eyes Janeway smiled slightly.

_Please Kathryn, just one more tiny kiss.He needs me._B'Elanna was silently pleading.

_Fine, just a… _Before Janeway could finish the thought, her lips were locked with Tom's again.This time Janeway tried to stay out of it, but it wasn't easy with the feel of warm lips on hers.She focused her thoughts on someone else and that someone just happened to walk into sickbay at that moment.

"Oh this is just too much!"At the sound of Chakotay's voice, Tom, Janeway and B'Elanna stood up with a jolt of surprise.The Doctor was just smiling sweetly.Life was great for the hologram.

"Chakotay, it's not what you think."Tom was the first to get his mouth to move.

"Mr. Paris, I don't really give a damn what this is.If you want to make out with the captain, who am I to stop you?I just can't believe you would do this to B'Elanna and even worse, I can't believe the great Captain Janeway, holder to such strict parameters is doing this.You make me sick, both of you."They all just stood with mouths hanging open at the shocking words coming from their usually soft-spoken and understanding first officer.Even the Doctor had stopped smiling.Chakotay had turned his back on them ready to leave sickbay.

"Commander, you are out of line.How dare you talk to me that way?"

"Excuse me Captain, you're right, I shouldn't talk to you that way.I shouldn't talk to you at all."He left the room before she could say another word.

"I would say that didn't go too well."

"Shut up Doctor."They all three said at once.

"Fine, I can see I'm not needed anymore."He walked back to B'Elanna's bio-bed and continued his work.

_"Captain, maybe I should go talk to him.He might listen to me."_

"Well he might if you were you, and besides he shouldn't act like that.Who the hell does he think he is anyway?"

"I would guess he thinks the woman he loves is betraying him with his ex-Maquis trader, who was supposed to be his friend.If I was in his shoes, I'd think the same thing.Maybe I should go talk to him."

_"Tom, Chakotay would just as soon kill you right now as listen to anything you had to say."_

"You do have a point B'Elanna, but we can't let him think what he's thinking."

"Why not, it serves him right, the arrogant pig."

"B'Elanna, was that you or the captain speaking?"

_"It wasn't me Flyboy.That was all our loving captain."_

"Would you two just leave me alone so I can think?Tom, don't you have a shuttle to unload?"

"Yes Ma'am.I'll see you later B'Elanna, well sort of."Tom quickly kissed his wife on Janeway's cheek and scurried out the door.

_"He is so sweet."_

"A real charmer indeed."Janeway tapped her com-badge."Janeway to Tuvok."

"Yes Captain."

"I'm leaving command of Voyager in your capable hands until tomorrow morning.I'll be in my quarters if it's an emergency."

"Aye Captain.What about Commander Chakotay, will he be assuming command?"

"No, if he shows up on the bridge, kick him off.You are in command."

"Understood, get some rest Captain, Tuvok out."

_"That was a bit harsh wasn't it?"_

"Mind your own business Lieutenant."

_"Yes Ma'am."_

"Doctor, I want double-time on B'Elanna's body.I'll be in my quarters ifand when you ever get finished."

"I'm doing my best Captain, but some things just can't be rushed."Janeway just glared at the Doctor then turned and left sickbay.The Doctor let out a sight of relief.He was glad he wasn't the one sharing the captain's body and mind.His holo-matrices would destabilize for sure.


	2. Me Myself & B'Elanna Chapter 2

"Me Myself * B'Elanna Chapter 2

"Me Myself * B'Elanna" 

Chapter 2

"Paris to Torres."Janeway rolled over in frustration at the hail.

_"Hi Tom, what's up?"_

"Hey B'Elanna, I just miss you.Have you eaten dinner yet?"

_"No, the captain is being stubborn, she won't feed me."_

"For hell sakes B'Elanna, you can't possibly be hungry anyway."

_"Well I am, and I want to have dinner with my husband, please!"_

"I promise I'll be good Captain.I just want to see B'Elanna, and you."Tom added quickly.

"Fine Tom, but we stay here in my quarters, and no more kissing, understood."

"Yes Ma'am.I'll be there soon and I'll bring the wine.Paris out."

"This ought to be fun."Janeway rolled off the couch and headed to the bedroom to change.

_"It will be fun, you'll see Captain."_Janeway had gone to her closet and picked out an over sized gray sweatshirt and sweat pants to put on._"Hey, that's not what we are gong to wear is it?I haven't seen Tom for over two weeks, can't we put on something a little more, sexy?"_

"No, we can not.I don't need you two flirting with each other using my body."Janeway pulled the sweatshirt over her head and looked in the mirror."This will do just fine."

_"Yuck, we look like a fat old lady."_

"Deal with it."

_"Can't we even have a bit of lipstick or comb your hair?"_Tom had wasted not time in getting there.The door chime sounded.

"Nope."Janeway headed out to answer the door."Come in Lieutenant."She left no doubt, as to who it was greeting him.

"Captain, you look…"

_"Like an old fat cow."_

"Not quite what I was going to say B'Elanna.It's just, kind of…"

_"Ugly!"_Once again, B'Elanna finished her husband's unspoken words.

"Are you going to stand in the doorway all night, or are you coming in Mr. Paris?"Tom walked through the threshold just as Chakotay passed by heading to his quarters.They were lucky they missed the profanity shot in their direction as the door hissed shut.

"Tom, is that the real thing?"Janeway was pointing to the bottle of wine he was holding.Tom was trying to judge what answer she was looking for before her responded. He didn't want to make the wrong move and get himself kicked out.He opted for the truth.

"It's the real thing Captain."

"Perfect."She grabbed the bottle and took it over to the table to open it."I think we could all use a good drink after what we've been through."

"I can agree with that."Tom joined them at the table.Janeway was already pouring them both a glass of wine.

_"Captain, be careful I don't handle alcohol very well."_

"Don't worry Lieutenant, I'll do all the drinking and besides, I'm drinking for two tonight."Tom started laughing as they clinked their glasses in a toast.

_"Ok, but I warned you.Tom, come and sit over here by me." _Janeway gave Tom a don't come any closer look.He didn't move.

"Sorry kids, this is a strictly hands off dinner.You're just going to have to wait until you're alone."

"Yes Ma'am."Tom winked at his wife, but Janeway just rolled her eyes and took another sip of her wine.

_"So Tom, tell us about the away mission."_Husband and wife continued the conversation and Janeway was content to let them share this time together.She was just as content to sip at her wine and stay out of it.

_"What the hell is he doing over there?Is he always this noisy Captain?"_

"Only when he's throwing furniture around."Janeway just sat back with a smile on her face.

"Captain, how long are you going to make him suffer?The poor guy is hurting."

"I'm not doing anything, if he wants to he can come over here and apologize then maybe I'll talk to him."

_"Now who is acting like kids Captain?Just go over there and tell him the truth, tell him how you feel."_

"You have no idea how I feel Lieutenant so back off."

_"That's where you are wrong Captain.I know every little detail of how you feel about Chakotay, and more than that, I know how hard this has been on you all these years not being able to tell him so.I'm not trying to hurt you or make you upset, but it's no secret how he feels about you too and you're both just too Starfleet to do anything about it."_Tom was a little afraid for his wife at the moment.She was digging through a taboo subject and they all knew it.

"B'Elanna, I don't think this is the best time for this conversation."

"Tom, that's the smartest thing you've said all night."They all jumped at the sound of another loud crash coming from Chakotay's quarters.The entire subject was dropped and the meal continued in silence until the interruption of the com-link.

"Vorik to Lieutenant Torres."

_"Torres here, what is it Vorik?"_

"I'm sorry to bother you Lieutenant, um Captain.I talked to the Doctor and he said it would be alright." __

_"Just get on with Vorik, what's the problem?"_

"We're still having problems with the thermal-reactors.We've been trying all day to stabilize the core temp and haven't gotten it down far enough.I was hoping you could give us a hand for just a few minutes.You always come up with a solution that we haven't thought of."__

_"I'll be there, or rather we'll be there in a few minutes.Just don't let the ship blow up before I get there."_

"Understood Vorik out."Janeway and B'Elanna went to stand up to leave, but they were a bit wobbly on her feet.

"B'Elanna, Captain, are you sure this is such a good idea?I don't think you should over do it."

_"Too late for that Tom, our captain has already overdone it with the wine."_Tom helped them get steady on her feet.

"We'll be just fine Lieutenant.Come on, you've got a job to do.I don't want my ship to blow up."

_"It's your body, who am I to argue, just don't throw-up on us."_

"I'll do my best.Let's go."

***

Chakotay was still fuming, but had calmed down considerably, or it could be because he couldn't find anything else to throw.He was still pacing around in his quarters when the hail came.

"Doctor to Commander Chakotay."

"Doctor I'm busy right now, what is it?"

"I would doubt you're busy Commander, unless you count brooding as busy."

"Well it just so happens that I do, so if you'll excuse me."

"Please Commander, I would like to talk to you."

"About what?"The Doctor chose his words carefully he knew Chakotay would just cut the link if he said the wrong thing.

"It's about Lieutenant Torres."He didn't mention the captain."Would you come to sickbay, please."

"Of course I'll come for B'Elanna.I'll be there shortly, Chakotay out."

_Well the first hurdle is over, now for the hard part of convincing him of what happened.If the captain would do her job and tell him, I wouldn't be put in the position in the first place.Humans can be so pigheaded, especially our gracious command team. I just hope they appreciate all the trouble I go through for them._The Doctor was lost in his thoughts as he continued to work on B'Elanna's body.He was also very pleased with what he'd done so far._She's looking even better than before._He still had a smile on his face when he turned at the sound of Chakotay walking in the room.

"Commander thanks for coming so quickly.Come over here so we can talk while I work on Lieutenant Torres."

"Doctor, how is she doing?I heard about the accident, but not any of the details.Is she going to be alright?"To Chakotay's eyes, she just looked like she was sleeping.The Doctor had repaired all the visible damage to her face and arms.There was a force-field around B'Elanna so he couldn't touch her or he would know how cold and lifeless her body felt. 

"Commander have a seat, I'd like to keep working while we talk."Chakotay pulled up a chair ready to listen.

***

"Lieutenant I think it's working.I don't know what you did but the temp is dropping.Great job Lieutenant."The Captain slid out from under the consol smiling at Vorik.She was covered in dirt and sweat and she had torn a hole in her big gray sweatshirt she still had on.

"Yes Lieutenant your captain does a great job.Thanks for the compliment."

"Yes Ma'am."Vorik looked a little embarrassed even for a Vulcan.

_"Excuse me Captain, but I believe you are taking credit where credit is not due.It wasn't you who came up with the idea."_

"So, it was my hands that did all the work.Besides, I was just about to mention it when you said something first."

_"Yea right, you were not, I know what you're thinking."_

"If you two will excuse me, I'll just leave you to work it out.Thanks again Lieutenant, Captain."Vorik nodded and left.Janeway was laughing.

_"You're impossible Captain."_B'Elanna tried to move Janeway's body, but found the captain wasn't about to help out.There was a distinct rumble in her stomach._"Oh no, you wouldn't."_

"I would."Janeway closed her eyes hoping it would pass."Just stay still Lieutenant.We're going to have to take this slowly."

_"I told you we were going to regret all the wine."_

"I only had two glasses B'Elanna.You sure don't drink like a Klingon do you?"The rumbling in Janeway's stomach intensified."I'm definitely not feeling too good."

_"Hang on Captain just take slow deep breaths.Do you think we can stand?I need to get to the replicator, I've got a cure programmed for just such an event."_

"We can try, and what is this so called cure?"They slowly started to stand, which caused their world to spin.

_"Damn, this is worse than the zero gravity training at the academy.I always hated that, now I remember why."_B'Elanna could feel Janeway start to slip into oblivion.They were sliding back down the wall._"Hold on Captain, don't you dare pass out on me.I can't do this alone."_

"I'm trying just give me a minute."Janeway just stood still with her eyes closed and stomach churning."B'Elanna, why did you let me drink that wine?It's your fault we feel sick now."

_"My fault!I told you not to, you just don't listen to anyone because you're the captain and you know it all."_

"Well congratulations Lieutenant, you've proven me wrong.I don't know it all.Now, let's get that cure and fast."They made it to the replicator and B'Elanna ordered her strange concoction.

_"Now, we have to drink this down in one gulp, ready?"_Janeway brought the small cup of smelly liquid to her lips.She just about lost all contents in her stomach.

"Ah, this is horrible, what the hell is in it?"

_"You don't want to know, just drink it, we'll feel much better."_In one quick gulp, Janeway downed the disgusting stuff.It burned clear through to her toes and caused her eyes to water. 

"B'Elanna, are you trying to kill me?"B'Elanna was laughing as Janeway struggled to even catch a breath.

_You'll be alright, just breath normal and let it start to work._B'Elanna couldn't say the words aloud because Janeway was gasping and choking._Come on Captain take it easy, It's starting to work can you feel it?_Janeway slowed her breathing and opened her eyes.The ship wasn't spinning as fast and she could feel her stomach start to settle._See that's better._

"B'Elanna you're a woman of many talents."

_"Yes I am, and don't forget that the next time I do something, not so talented."_

"I'm sure you'll remind me.Let's go, I'm getting very sleepy."

_"Just an effect of the cure.We'll both sleep good tonight."_They slowly made it to Janeway's quarters and had no sooner plopped on the bed than they were both fast asleep.

***

"Doctor, how is this possible?I've never heard of anything so crazy, and why the captain?Never mind, I already know that answer."The Doctor just smiled over at Chakotay.He had enjoyed watching the play of emotion cross the Commanders face during his tale of the impossible.He was becoming more proud of himself by the minute.

"It's possible Commander, because I am the best.I've read about a few other cases that were somewhat similar, but this is a first where both conscious minds are active in one body."

"Is this harming either one of them Doctor?"

"Nothing permanent although it's more of a strain on the captain's already overworked body, and they could end up killing each other before I get B'Elanna's body finished."

"How much longer will it be?"

"I'm not sure, but I hope I'll be able to transfer Lieutenant Torres back to her own body sometime tomorrow afternoon.Commander, now that you know, I hope you're going to be a bit more supportive to the captain.This has been just as hard on her as Lieutenant Torres."

"I know that, but it's too late to do anything about it right now.I'll try and talk to her in the morning, I'll think about it anyway."Chakotay had one of his mischievous smiles on his face.

"Commander, what are you planning?I only told you because I felt sorry for you and I thought you could help."

"Don't worry Doctor, I can and will help, when the time is right."Chakotay headed for the door."Goodnight Doctor."Chakotay was in such a good mood now he almost skipped all the way to his quarters.He briefly paused at Kathryn's door and even thought about talking to her, but the desire for a bit of teasing was stronger.He'd tell her tomorrow after he had a little fun with it.

***

_The time is 0530._The computer's voice broke into B'Elanna's nice dream she'd been having._The time is now 0531._B'Elanna had one eye open the other wouldn't cooperate.

_Kathryn wakeup and tell that damn alarm to shut up._She didn't receive a response.

_The time is now 0532._

_"Captain!Wake up."_Janeway's other eye opened.

"Computer, reset alarm."She closed both of her eyes and went back to sleep.B'Elanna did the same.Whatever that concoction was, it worked wonders.

***

"Good morning Harry, Tuvok."Chakotay strolled onto the bridge.

"Commander it's nice to have you back."

"Nice to be back Ensign."Just then, Tom walked off the turbo-lift.He glanced at Chakotay, but was afraid to meet his eyes.He wasn't quite sure if Chakotay would try to kill him or not.He quickly walked past them and sat at his station."What, no acknowledgements this morning Mr. Paris?"Chakotay was going to enjoy this.

"Sorry Sir."He had no further reply.Chakotay walked to the command center.

"Where's the Captain, she's already five minutes late?"

"I'm sure she'll be here momentarily Commander."Clearly none of them knew that Chakotay knew the whole situation, and he wasn't about to spill the beans just yet."Would you like me to contact her Commander?"

"No Tuvok, I'm sure Mr. Paris here can tell us why the Captain is late.So Lieutenant, just how late did you keep her up anyway?"Chakotay was doing his best to keep a straight face.Tom turned around in his seat to face him.

"I don't know what you're talking about, we didn't do anything, I didn't do anything.If you'd let me explain I…"

"Oh don't bother Lieutenant, I don't want to hear it.I'll just contact her myself."He tapped his com-badge."Chakotay to Captain Janeway."They could all hear some slight rustling, but no voice."Chakotay to Janeway."This time they all heard Janeway's voice, although slightly more low and raspy than usual.

_"Go away."_Chakotay just about blew his cover trying to suppress his building laughter.

"Excuse me Captain, could you repeat that, I didn't quite hear you?"

_"I said, go…"_

"Damnit!What time is it?"Chakotay couldn't have responded if he'd wanted to, Janeway had cut the link.Biting his tongue, he just glared at Tom.

"Maybe I should go see if the captain needs any help."Tom was dieing to get out from under Chakotay's glaring look.

"That might be a good idea Lieutenant.Why don't you just go give sleeping beauty a kiss to wake her?"Harry busted out laughing, while Tom ran for the turbo-lift.He didn't stop until the doors had closed.

"Ensign Kim, this situation is not that funny."

"Sorry Tuvok, but I haven't seen anything quite so funny in years."Poor Harry just couldn't help it. 

"Commander Chakotay, there is something you need to know."Chakotay turned around in his seat to face Tuvok and at the same time, busted out laughing along with Harry.

"It's ok Commander, I already know."

"You knew, why didn't you say so in the first place?"Harry commented before Tuvok could say anything.

"And spoil all the fun, come on Harry, two can play at this game.The captain chose not to inform her first officer, I'm just returning the favor."

"I fail to see the logic in either one of you.This is a serious matter and the command team should treat it as such."

"There is no logic in it Tuvok.Sometimes when a situation is as serious as this, it's the best way for humans to deal with the pressure.Teasing is just part of life and in this case, I didn't start it, the captain did."Tuvok just raised both eyebrows and continued working at his station.

"So when are you going to tell them you know?"Harry was enjoying this indeed. 

"I don't know yet, but you'd better keep quiet Ensign."

"Don't worry about me, I'm having too much fun watching all this."Chakotay was still looking at Tuvok.

"Tuvok, can I count on you?"Tuvok looked up from his work with not a hint of expression on his face.Chakotay was a little worried.

"While I don't agree with your tactics, it is most entertaining."

"Indeed Tuvok, indeed."

***

Janeway and B'Elanna drug Janeway's body to the door to answer the insistent chime.

"B'Elanna open the door, it's me Tom."The door swished open."Captain, you look like hell.B'Elanna are you alright?"

_"I'm fine.Good morning Sweetheart."_B'Elanna advanced toward to her husband.

"Oh no B'Elanna, I'm not kissing you looking and smelling like that."Tom backed away from them.Janeway started laughing.

"Come on Tom, this is your last chance to kiss your Captain, you have my permission."Janeway and B'Elanna were both laughing now.

"No thank you Captain, I'll pass."He walked to the other side of the room."No offence, but would you go and shower and brush your teeth?Commander Chakotay is in a bad mood, and why are you so late anyway?"

"It's not my fault.Your wife turned off the alarm."

_"I did not, you did, I just told you to."_

"Well you'd better get going before the Commander throws us all in the brig."

"He can't do that, I'm still the captain."

"Don't bet on it.You didn't see the mood he was in.Captain maybe I could take the rest of the day off, do something away from the bridge."

"Not a chance Mr. Paris.You're in this as deep as the rest of us.Now fix me some coffee and we'll be back in a jiffy."

_"No more coffee Captain."_Tom just laughed at the two of them as they headed to the shower.

***

The three of them were in the turbo-lift on their way to the bridge."Captain, is that offer for one last kiss still open?You do look and smell much better."

"No, it was a one time offer."B'Elanna slugged him on the arm again.

_"You're really enjoying this aren't you, you pig."_

"Ouch, that's no way to treat the man who loves you."

"You two knock it off, I'm already in enough trouble."

"Captain you walk out first, just incase Chakotay decides to throw something."

"In that case, I'll be sure to duck Mr. Paris."The lift doors opened.Janeway walked onto the bridge and nodded a greeting to Harry and Tuvok.She quietly took her command chair as Tom took his seat at the helm, hoping that Chakotay wouldn't get him from behind.

"Nice of you to grace us with your presence Captain."Chakotay's icy tone struck a nerve with Janeway.

"Commander, back off.I'm still the captain of this ship and I expect to be treated with some respect."Chakotay was about to throw a verbal counter-punch when he saw that Janeway was looking rather strange._B'Elanna!Don't do it, I swear I'll through you out an airlock at the first opportunity._

_I'm trying to hold it in, but it's not my fault.If you would take better care of yourself, I wouldn't have so much gas._Tom had turned back around to face his wife and captain.He was a bit concerned at the look on their face.

"Captain, maybe I should get you to sickbay, you don't look so well."Janeway's response wasn't what any of them expected.Once again, B'Elanna let out a disgusting belch.Janeway just buried her face in her hands.

_Well you got to admit Captain you do feel better._

"A little too much late night partying with Mr. Paris, ha Captain?"Chakotay just couldn't help it.He knew he would probably never be forgiven, but the urge to get one more jibe in was too strong.

"Commander, this isn't what…"Janeway held out a hand to stop Tom from further comment.

_Captain, don't be too hard on him._

"Shut the hell up Lieutenant."There was fire in her eyes and B'Elanna could feel she'd pushed too far.

"Excuse me Captain?I'm still a commander, unless you forgot to inform me otherwise."Janeway was glaring so intently at Chakotay that he was almost afraid he'd over done it himself.

"You son of a bitch." Janeway was practically spitting fire now.Chakotay was biting his lower lip to keep from laughing.

"Captain Janeway!That is highly inappropriate language for a Starfleet Captain."Tuvok was hoping that it was Lieutenant Torres who had made that comment, but feared it was not.

"Shut up Tuvok."It was the Captain, but wisely, Tuvok made no further comment.Harry and Tom just stared at the command team in shock.B'Elanna didn't dare even think let alone make a comment."My ready room, **now** Commander."Janeway was out of her seat and in the ready room before Chakotay could have responded. 

"It would seem you have pushed too far Commander."Tuvok wasn't happy with this situation.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it."Chakotay walked toward the ready room.

"What do you mean you'll take care of it?"Tom called out."You already know the truth don't you?"Chakotay just smiled as he left the bridge. _That son of a bitch._Tom mumbled under his breath.

***

"Commander you are in serious danger of spending the rest of this journey home in the brig.What gives you the right to treat me like that?I'm still the captain of this ship, or have you forgotten?"Chakotay just stood silently letting her vent her frustration.He was trying to keep his dimples from popping out.

_Captain, take it easy.I'm sure he wouldn't be acting like this if he knew the truth.It's partly your fault._Janeway put her hands over her ears as if that would block out B'Elanna's voice.Her head was really pounding now.Janeway walked to the replicator and ordered a glass of ice water.Chakotay had followed her and was standing right in front of her as the smile broke out on his face at last.The dimples were in full view.

"What in the hell are you smiling at Commander?"

"That was a good belch, but I know you can do better than that B'Elanna."Before he could even think to duck out of the way, he was rewarded with the glass of ice water in his face."Hey!Which one of you was that?"

"Both."

_"You really are a son of a bitch Chakotay.I can't believe you would do this.How long have you known the truth anyway?"_Janeway was still too furious to respond.She was content to just let B'Elanna at him.Chakotay was wiping the water from his face.

"I wouldn't have had to do anything if you and the captain would have informed me in the first place.It would seem to me that I'm the one who deserves an apology."

"I owe you an apology Commander, I think not."

"I think so, Captain.After all, I'm the one who was left thinking you were having fun with B'Elanna's husband.How could you let me think that?Also, you called me a son of a bitch in front of the entire bridge crew."

_"You are."_

"B'Elanna, stay out of it."Janeway was pacing around now.

"Fine Commander, I do apologize for that rude comment."

_"I don't."_

"B'Elanna!"Janeway and Chakotay said together.

_"Fine, I'll just take a nap or something."_Janeway had her doubts about that.

"I'm sorry Kathryn, I may have gotten a bit carried away with the teasing, but you should have told me in the first place.I've been worried sick about both of you."

"I'm sorry, but you never gave me much of a chance to explain.You just happened to see the wrong things at the wrong time."Janeway had taken a seat on the couch and Chakotay joined her.She really did look tired and way over-stressed.

"Kathryn, B'Elanna, are you really alright?I can't imagine how hard this has been on both of you."Chakotay had taken Janeway's hand in his."Is there anything I can do to help?"

_Oh, he is so sweet he's melting your heart._

_B'Elanna, I thought you were napping._

_Can't sleep, say something to him, he looks like he's about to cry._

_He is not._

"Kathryn, did you hear me, are you ok?"Chakotay really was concerned now.

_You better say something or I will._

_Keep your mouth shut Lieutenant. _"We're fine Chakotay.It will all be over soon anyway, at least it better be."

_Come on Kathryn get a little closer to him.He won't bite, and besides what would be wrong with that anyway?_

_B'Elanna!_

"The Doctor said he should be done anytime now.I'm sure he'll be contacting you both soon."Janeway was trying to keep a straight face even though B'Elanna was driving her nuts with all the remarks in her head.She had also managed to move Janeway just a bit closer to Chakotay.

_Kathryn, just ask him to have dinner with you tonight, I'm sure he wants to as much as you do._

"How do you know?"Janeway blurted out without thinking.Chakotay looked confused.

"How do I know what?Is that you Captain, or B'Elanna?"

"It was me yelling at B'Elanna, she's driving me crazy."

_"Then just ask him and I'll be good."_

"Ask me what?"Chakotay was starting to enjoy this again.

"Fine Lieutenant I'll ask him, just stay out of it."

_"Aye Captain."_Chakotay was laughing now.This really was comical watching Kathryn fight with B'Elanna as one person.He just waited patiently for the upcoming question.

"Chakotay."

"Yes."

"Would you stop with that silly grin?This isn't all that funny."

"I'm finding this most entertaining.Now what were you going to ask me Kathryn?"

"Will you have dinner with me tonight?"

"That's it, that's all you wanted to ask me?We have dinner all the time, of course I will."

_"But tonight is going to be different."_B'Elanna slid Janeway's hand across Chakotay's muscular thigh, slightly brushing her fingers along the inside of his leg.Janeway let out a gasp.Chakotay couldn't describe the sensation it caused in him and B'Elanna was laughing hysterically.When Janeway could finally get control over her own body, she jerked her hand from Chakotay's leg and jumped to her feet.

"THAT IS IT, I'VE HAD IT LIEUTENANT!"She smacked her com-badge."Janeway to the Doctor."

"Yes Captain."

"I want B'Elanna out of me NOW, I don't care if you're finished with the repairs to her body or not.I mean NOW."

"Ok, don't bite my head off, I was just about to contact you anyway.I'll be ready for you two in about an hour.Do you think you can manage not to kill her for that much longer?"Janeway turned back at the sound of Chakotay laughing.He was sprawled out on the couch in a fit of laughter.He was next on her list to go out the airlock.

"I'll do my best.We'll be there in less than an hour, Janeway out."Without another word, Janeway stormed out of the ready room at warp speed.Chakotay, after catching his breath ran after her.

"Kathryn wait, I'm sorry."She just headed for the turbo-lift without slowing down.Tom had jumped to his feet as well and headed toward the turbo-lift also.

"B'Elanna stop, what's happening?"He followed Chakotay, who followed Janeway, with B'Elanna into the turbo-lift.The doors closed locking them all in there together.

Harry Kim let out a big sigh."This is one scene I'm glad I won't be present for."

"You and me both Ensign."Tuvok gave Harry a nod and they continued their work in silence.

***

"Computer, halt turbo-lift."Chakotay turned to face Janeway."I said I was sorry Kathryn, I didn't do anything anyway."Janeway wouldn't even look at either Chakotay or Tom.She just stood with her eyes closed and arms folded."Come on Kathryn, talk to me?"He received no response.

"B'Elanna will you at lest talk to me?What happened in there?"B'Elanna, as much as she wanted to answer didn't dare.Tom reached out his hand and placed it on Janeway's shoulder.B'Elanna, I just want to help, talk to me."

"Mr. Paris, get you hands off of her."Chakotay wasn't playing games.He was still very upset about Tom kissing Janeway even though it wasn't Janeway, but it was.The whole thing was giving him a headache.

"Just who are you to tell me to keep my hands off?This is my wife and I'll touch her anytime I want."Tom was mad and didn't care if Chakotay tried to kill him or not.

"She is not your wife, she's your captain and I'm warning you to keep your hands off."__

_Captain: do something before they kill each other._B'Elanna was getting nervous.

"Oh you're warning me, just what are your going to do about it?"Tom tightened his hold on the Captain's arm.

_Captain please!_Janeway remained silent, but a smile was sneaking out on her face.

"Mr. Paris, I don't think you want to know what I'm going to do about it."Chakotay took a step toward Tom.Janeway stepped back releasing Tom's hold on her arm.She spoke in a soft calm voice.

"Computer, resume lift."The turbo-lift started moving again as Janeway stood with her arms folded and the smile on her face.Chakotay noticed from the corner of his eye that she was smiling.Both him and Tom looked back over at her, not sure what was going on now.

"B'Elanna would you please talk to me?"

_"I can't, I'll get thrown out an airlock if I do."_

"Kathryn, will you talk to me?"The turbo-lift stopped and the doors opened.Janeway pushed between the two of them and out the door.

"Sorry Commander, I don't want to.Goodbye."Janeway walked toward her quarters leaving the two attention deprived men to work it out on their own. 

"Well that didn't work too well Lieutenant.I guess neither one of us is any good with women."

"I guess we're pretty pathetic aren't we," the two busted out laughing."Chakotay, I'm sorry about what's happened.I didn't understand this whole thing at first myself.That kiss may have been the Captain's lips, but all I could feel was my wife.I wouldn't do anything like that and you know it."

"I know Tom, I guess I'm still trying to believe this whole crazy thing.I haven't had as much time to deal with it as you have."

"Speaking of time, how long have you known and why didn't you say something?"

"The Doctor just told me last night and I was going to say something, but I just couldn't pass up the chance to have some fun.I'm sorry, well sort of.It was fun, especially in the ready room."

"What happened in the ready room?"Now Tom was feeling a bit jealous.

"Nothing really, well nothing as good as that kiss you got.How about we drop the whole thing and I buy you a drink.I just happen to know where you keep the good stuff."

"Nothing gets past you and the captain does it, and if it's my stuff, how does that make it that you are buying the drink?"Chakotay slapped Tom on the back.

"Easy, I'll just owe you one."The two friends left to find the secret stash.

***

Janeway was stretched out on her sofa trying to relax before they went to sickbay.She was going to give the Doctor ten more minutes and that was it."B'Elanna your thoughts are awfully quiet.I know you have something to say, so you might as well get it out, it will be your last chance to read my mind.What is it?"

_"I'm just a little worried about the whole thing and I'm hoping you won't kill me when I'm me again for what I did to you and Chakotay."_

"I won't say the thought didn't cross my mind, but I couldn't run this ship without you and I think I'd even miss you."

_"Thanks, I'm going to miss you too.It's been fun, well for the most part anyway.You know, until living inside of you I never realized just how hard it is to be the captain.You have so much to worry about, and so many damn reports to do."_They both started laughing over that._"I just wanted to thank you for being the best Captain and the best friend I've ever had.I'll never be able to repay you for what you've done for me."_

"B'Elanna stop, you're going to make us cry."

_"Sorry Captain, what was I thinking?"_

"The same thing I've been thinking.That you are a dear friend, and as hard as this has been on both of us I'd do it again without question."

_"All of it, even the hand on Chakotay's leg?"_

"Most definitely not all of it, but my hand on Chakotay's leg would be an enjoyable repeat performance."

_"Ha!I knew it.You did enjoy it."_

"B'Elanna, if you say anything."

_"I know, I know, airlock city for me."_

"So you finally caught on to the way things are run around here, now that we are about to become two again."

_"I'm just a bit slow I suppose."_

"Well I think the Doctor has had enough time, what do say we get this over with."

_"I'm as ready as I'll ever be, but I wish Tom would be there with me."_

"Don't worry Lieutenant.I have a feeling that both of our crazy men will be pounding on the door to be with us."They left Janeway's quarters for the last time as one and walked to sickbay in silence.

***

The Doctor was just about ready to begin the procedure to reintegrate B'Elanna's conscious mind into her body.He was a little nervous, but would never admit to it.This was the second major obstacle of the whole thing.If this didn't work, B'Elanna would be lost to them forever.He could not let that happen. 

Janeway had already been given a light sedative and was lying quietly on the bio-bed next to B'Elanna's body, which was still in stasis.Right on Que, they heard the pounding on the sickbay doors.The Doctor had sealed the doors so there would be no interruptions.The slightest mistake would be fatal for both of them.

_See Lieutenant, I told you they would be here._"Doctor, would you please open the doors before they break my ship trying to get in."

"If I must, but they can only stay a minute.This is not going to be an observation room."He walked to the door and disengaged his security lock.

"Doctor, what did you lock us out for?That's my wife you're going to be putting back together."

"I'm well aware who it is Lieutenant, but you and the Commander are only staying a few minutes.I can't have any interruptions.

"Fine Doc we just want to wish them luck."Chakotay and Tom walked over to Janeway, the Doctor stepped into his office to give them some privacy.

"B'Elanna, are you aloud to talk to me yet?"Tom had walked around to the left side of the bio-bed and had taken Janeway's hand in his.She didn't try to pull away, which B'Elanna was grateful for.

_"Yes I can talk to you.I'm just a little sleepy and a little scared."_Chakotay had taken Janeway's other hand brushing his thumb over the soft skin of her fingers.Once again, she didn't try to pull away.

"How are you feeling Kathryn?"

"About the same as B'Elanna.The Doctor has a way with a hypo-spray."She started to giggle, evidence of her statement.Chakotay couldn't help the full force smile he let creep across his face.

"B'Elanna, I'll be right here when you wake up.I promise everything will be fine."

_"Tom, you can't promise that.This could be the last time I ever see you and I can't even kiss you goodbye."_Janeway's eyes were starting to fill with tears.B'Elanna used Janeway's hand to brush across Tom's cheek._"I love you Flyboy."_

"I love you too B'Elanna, everything's going to be fine."

"Go ahead Tom, you'd better kiss your wife so we can get this over with."Janeway smiled at him.

"Yes Ma'am."Tom leaned down and placed a sweet and gentle kiss on Janeway's lips.Although it wasn't the frenzied passionate kiss he'd seen in the shuttle-bay, it still sent a surge of jealousy through Chakotay.

"Alright already Paris, that's enough."Chakotay's smile had vanished, but he hadn't let go of Janeway's hand, in fact, he was squeezing it even harder.Tom removed his lips from his wife and his captain.Janeway and B'Elanna were both smiling this time.

_"Chakotay, you are so sexy when you're jealous."_

"B'Elanna!"They all three yelled at once.

_"Sorry, I just had to get the last word in."_

"Sorry Lieutenant, but the last word always belongs to the captain."Janeway winked at Chakotay."Commander," He leaned closer to Janeway who was starting to look rather dazed from the medication.

"Yes Captain."

"Let go of my hand, you're crushing my fingers."She had closed her eyes.The medication had taken full effect.Tom and Chakotay both let go of Janeway's hands and turned to leave sickbay.

"Well Commander, I guess the Captain really does get the last word in."Tom was snickering. 

"No funny Lieutenant."Tom didn't dare make a comment, but inside he was still laughing.

***

Two and a half hours later, the Doctor had accomplished the impossible.His two patients were now two again.Both the Captain and B'Elanna's vital signs were normal and they were breathing on their own.Now to make sure their conscious minds were where they should be.The Doctor put the hypo to the Captain's neck first.He thought it safer to have the Captain fully awake, just in case he needed protection from B'Elanna if everything hadn't gone just right.There was really no way to know for sure until she was awake.Janeway started to stir.Her eyes fluttered a few times before she opened them all the way and tried to focus on his face.

"Doctor, did it work, is B'Elanna alright?"Her voice sounded a little slurred and weak but she was coming around.

"Everything went just fine Captain.B'Elanna is back in her own body but we won't know if her mind is intact until we wake her up.How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, just a little lightheaded and kind of empty.It's really quiet too."

"The quiet I'm sure you're grateful for, the lightheadedness will pass soon."He helped Janeway to a sitting position and handed her a glass of water.Janeway looked over at B'Elanna.She looked so peaceful, like she'd just been taking a nap for the last few days.Janeway felt a sudden pang of regret.What if B'Elanna's mind was gone, what if it hadn't worked?"The Doctor could see the fear in Janeway's eyes."We won't know until we wake her Captain."He went over to B'Elanna and placed the hypo to her neck.He quickly stepped back to Janeway's bio-bed.Janeway just smiled at him.

"Coward."

"Why do you think I woke you first?"B'Elanna started to stir.Neither the Doctor nor Janeway knew quite what to expect, but they weren't prepared for what happened next.B'Elanna shot up to a sitting position and started screaming wildly.The Doctor, to his credit had secured her to the bio-bed, just in case.

"Tom!Tom!"

"B'Elanna, calm down you're in sickbay, it's ok you're alright."Janeway tried her best but her words weren't sinking in.B'Elanna just kept screaming and calling for her husband."Doctor, go unlock the door and get Tom in here."Janeway was starting to panic herself.The Doctor had already made it to the door and Tom burst through and ran to his wife.

"B'Elanna!Sweetheart, it's me it's ok, it's Tom I'm right here."He grabbed her by the shoulders and managed to get her attention.She stopped screaming and was taking a few gasping breath's."You're going to be ok B'Elanna, I'm right here."Tom wrapped his arms around his wife.She sank into his arms and buried her head in his chest."Just relax everything is ok, I'm not leaving you."Tom just continued to sooth his wife letting her conscious mind reintegrate its self into her body.It must have been just as big of a shock as when she woke up in Janeway's body.The Doctor walked over to them and ran his tricorder over B'Elanna.He answered Tom's unasked question.

"Everything's fine she just needs a little time to adjust."The Doctor put another hypo to her neck."This will just help to calm her down."

"Thanks Doc."Tom just held his wife as she became completely quiet in his arms.For a moment, he thought she'd fallen asleep.Janeway was now standing next to them both with her hand on B'Elanna's back.

"B'Elanna, it's me Kathryn, you're going to be fine.We did it Lieutenant, we're both alive and you are you again."B'Elanna unburied her face from Tom's chest and looked up at her friend and captain with tears in her eyes.

"Thanks to my expert skills."The Doctor had cut in.B'Elanna then turned her gaze to the Doctor who was standing on the other side of the bio-bed.None of them had noticed the extra guest who had quietly slipped in.B'Elanna had untangled herself from her husband and threw her arms around the Doctor's neck placing a kiss on his lips.

"Doctor, thank you, I love you."B'Elanna was so overjoyed she just couldn't help it.When she let go of the Doctor, he had a grin from ear to ear plastered on his face.Janeway and Tom were laughing.B'Elanna turned her attention to her husband and gave him a very passionate kiss then whispered something in his ear that turned Tom a shade of blushing pink.

"I can't wait."He smiled at his wife as she turned her attention to Janeway.The tears were pooling in her eyes again and a lump had formed in her throat.B'Elanna couldn't think of words enough to thank Janeway for what she had done for her.B'Elanna just kissed Janeway as well then pulled her into a crushing bear-bug.The tears were freely running down both their faces.

"You know, there is just way too much kissing going on here."All three turned in surprise at the sound of Chakotay's voice.After the momentary shock wore off, they all busted out laughing.Janeway was trying to be dignified about it, but she was laughing the hardest.

"What's the matter Commander, are you jealous?"Janeway even winked at him again as he walked toward them.

"Come here Chakotay, I'll give you a kiss."B'Elanna was enjoying this.Tom was a bit surprised when Chakotay took her up on the offer and wrapped his arms around his wife kissing her soundly.B'Elanna didn't seem to mind in the least, but the look on Janeway's face made it all worth it.She was jealous and there was no denying it.

"Hey you two, I think that's about enough.Get away from my wife old man.Go find someone of your own."That brought the laughter back to all of them, although Janeway had put on her Captain's face letting Chakotay know she was slightly miffed.That realization just made him smile even more.

"I hate to break up this little family fun and games, but my patients need some rest and I've got to run a few test on Lieutenant Torres before I release her."

"Fine Doctor, when can I get out of here?"Janeway was already climbing the walls.

"In an hour or two, and you will be on light duty for the next twenty-four hours."He was grateful she didn't fight him on that one.

"Doc, are you sure B'Elanna's alright, she's been through a lot?"Tom had taken his wife's hand and was clearly still concerned.

"I believe so Lieutenant.That's why I'm going to do some more test and she will have to stay in sickbay for a day or two.Her body, as well as her mind has been through the ringer.We need to make sure everything is working right and back to normal before I release her."The Doctor was even more surprised when B'Elanna didn't argue with him."Now, both of you get out of here so I can get back to work."Tom gave his wife's hand a squeeze.

"I'll be back later and I'm staying with you in sickbay tonight whether the Doc likes it or not."The Doctor just rolled his eyes and walked back to his office.

"Bye Tom, I'll be waiting.Bye Chakotay, thanks for the kiss."B'Elanna lay back on the bio-bed laughing quietly.Janeway was still standing by B'Elanna with her arms folded. 

"Any time B'Elanna."He received a good slug on the arm from Tom."Well maybe not."Janeway was laughing now.

"Serves you right Commander, you shouldn't go around kissing other peoples wives."

"No one else will kiss me."He smiled devilishly at Janeway.

"Poor baby, now get out of here and don't forget about dinner tonight.Your quarters and you're cooking, my place looks like a Klingon lives there."She smiled just as devilishly back at him.

"Hey, I'm not the slob.You are."

"I think I'll have to agree with B'Elanna on that one.My quarters it is."Chakotay and Tom walked out before Janeway could make another comment.She thought best to save it for later anyway.

"You know Captain, it's nice to know I had a hand in your relationship with Chakotay."B'Elanna was just smiling at Janeway.

"That was my hand Lieutenant, but thanks just the same."Janeway just smiled back at B'Elanna and sat back on her own bio-bed.

"So it was, but we do make a pretty good team don't you think?I know you quite well now."B'Elanna was still smiling but Janeway was not.

"I'm not sure I like that last part too well.I've always been a private person being able to keep some things a secret."

"Don't worry Kathryn, you only let me see the secrets that we already knew.How much you care about everyone on this ship, even Tom.How strong your desire to get this crew home really is, and most of all, how much you love Chakotay.Not much of a secret to anyone, unless you count yourself."Janeway just smiled slightly, but gave no reply so B'Elanna continued."If anything, I have more respect and admiration for you than anyone on this ship and not just because you are the captain, but because you are my friend.I take that very seriously.It's not easy being my friend, ask anyone.I'm not easy to get along with."

"You can say that again.You're also not easy to live with."

"No, I guess not.Thanks for not killing me."Janeway was laughing now.

"You're welcome."They were both laughing when the Doctor came out of his office.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing Doctor, just girl talk."Janeway answered for both of them.Nothing more was said as the Doctor started on his test.Janeway and B'Elanna's mind's had both drifted to more important matters, and this time their thoughts were their own.

***

Janeway was right on time standing in front of Chakotay's door.She was nervous even though they had done this countless times before.Tonight was going to be different though, and she knew the next few hours would change their relationship, one way or the other.She took a deep breath and rang the door chime.

"Come in Kathryn."She had a smile on her face as she walked in.

"Something sure smells great.What's for dinner?"

"It's a new dish that Neelix helped me come up with.An old recipe of my mothers that we revised a bit.I hope you're hungry because there's a lot of food here.By the way, you look great."He flashed her a smile, which she couldn't help but return.

"Thanks, and I am hungry.I think B'Elanna left her appetite in me."They were both laughing as Chakotay handed her a glass of wine."Remind me Commander that I only get one glass of wine.If B'Elanna left her appetite, she probably left her lack of tolerance for alcohol.Last time, two glasses about did me in and I'm not up for another one of her quick cures."Chakotay was laughing so hard he almost spilled the wine.

"Didn't B'Elanna tell you she couldn't handle much alcohol?"

"Yes, but I chose the 'I'm the Captain' approach thinking I knew it all."Chakotay was laughing even harder now.

"Well then it serves you right."

"Thanks for your compassion Commander.I'll know where to come when I need a shoulder to cry on."

"I'll always be here for you, unless I catch you kissing Mr. Paris again."Their laughter rang throughout the room as the command team of Voyager relaxed and enjoyed themselves.The conversation over dinner was lighthearted and stayed away from the topic of the last few days.After dinner, the two sat side by side on Chakotay's couch, Kathryn with her favorite beverage and Chakotay with another glass of wine.

"Chakotay, I would like to apologize for not telling you right away.I was really going to, but the situation just got out of hand and then I couldn't swallow my pride to tell you.The last few days have been a challenge to say the least."

"It's ok Kathryn, I do understand, besides my being such a…"

"Son of a bitch?"Chakotay just smiled.

"Not quite what I was going to say, but I guess I really was.I do feel bad about the way I acted, but at the time I just couldn't help it."

"You are a big tease Commander, but I wouldn't change a thing about you."Chakotay sat his glass down on the table and turned to face Kathryn.His look was very serious.

"All teasing aside Kathryn, are you really alright?I have been worried about you and B'Elanna.I can't imagine what that must have been like."

"It wasn't easy, but I'd do it again if need be, for anyone on this crew.The Doctor assures me that the headache and the sense of loss will go away in a few days.There's one thing I've learned from going through this."

"What's that?"Chakotay was still being very serious so he didn't see this one coming.

"Lieutenant Paris is a good kisser."Chakotay's mouth opened but nothing would come out.He was speechless."Chakotay, I'm just kidding, B'Elanna kisses much better than he does."Now Chakotay started laughing.

"Don't I know it."He was rewarded with a pillow from the couch thrown at him."Hey, you started it."

"Well I'm about to finish it too.I really am tired and it will be nice not to have B'Elanna snoring in my head all night.

"Are you sure it was her that was snoring?"He was still trying to have some last minute fun with the whole thing.

"Don't you start too, I do not snore, and how would you know anyway?"

"I live right next door, remember?"Janeway didn't answer she just kept that cute little half smile in place looking into his eyes.Chakotay was mesmerized.Janeway slowly, but accurately slid her hand over his thigh in a most familiar gesture, then leaned over and softly brushed her lips over his.Before Chakotay's mind could register all the sensations, she had stood up and was headed for the door.

"Good night Commander."She turned back to give him one last smile then disappeared.The doors to Chakotay's quarters swished closed behind her, leaving a very stunned Commander grinning from ear to ear.

The End


End file.
